Day 035

 Dear dreamer,

A team member

Yes...I found one when I was not necessarily looking. I found someone that I want to be on the team. She's not a really technical person but, she brings resilience into her work, which is always a plus. I had a team member now, but only in mind not yet on site but, we were working on a project together. Now, I was going to give details of the new project but I can't- just standard protocol. It's not just very wise because of issues that might come up later.

I was crashing from time-to-time but, I had to keep getting up. Product 2 has a 60-day prep period  and I have about 25 days left. In terms of performance, I was not bad but I think there's room for improvement. Honestly, I have been sleeping on it (figuratively).

Second thing is, I can not quite abandon the idea of product 1, it is a solid one. The idea was something I would definitely do some time later. When or how, I did not exactly know but I need to leave the idea for now, it's effect was cascading...It would not do me any good if I did not leave and suddenly I wondered again; How long would this go on? I did not exactly know if I am doing the right thing in all of this. How many more decisions would I have to make based on little or no information, or follow a gut feeling- with absolutely no logic. I know control is overrated but I just want a semblance of it every now and then before I am thrown into yet another conundrum. 

Making choices especially poor ones and letting them accumulate leaving a huge mess behind, one you might realise later than sooner. So much guess work, it just tires you out sometimes. That's why I take breaks sometimes, no choosing, just breathing and going with the flow. The tide can be exhausting to navigate so I just let it toss me around while silently hoping I don't regret it. Take busy breaks and relax. You only get this chance, utilise it maximally. No pennies... but I seem to have a job now so we'll see...


                                   ~A Penniless Dreamer

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