Day 017

 Dear dreamer, 

Rerouting...

At this time, I was a little bit shaken. I had posted on the blog for four days and I did not have feedback. Well, not quite...I had positive feedback but I was sceptical of the crowd. Usually, if I write something I might post, I send to my friends to hear what they think of it but I did not take this route because strangely, I felt it was necessary to keep the essence right in it. 

I posted the link on my socials and one of my friends I had told about the blog when I decided to do it recognised it immediately it was on my socials and some people who have seen other things I wrote in the past guessed I was the writer and said it was nice. A couple of people saw it too and also commented positively. The good comments were too many, not a single criticism and that is exactly what I was expecting. 

I decided to seek the opinion of someone that had absolutely no reason to flatter or try to 'encourage' me. I chose my cousin and her comments were severely flattering and positive than the ones I had received previously. I asked another person and it was the same and I felt so much pressure all at once. I started this blog to have fun doing something I could do easily and now people were looking forward to it and were interested.

In that moment, I saw myself disappointing everyone who was engaged in this and it felt awful and I could feel my mind shift from 'my blog' to 'content creation'. What that meant is I stopped writing stuffs because I want to, it was now about what people wanted to see- of which I had no clue. As I prepared to post Day 05, I could feel my confidence fade with every character I typed, I had this one thing and was I going to ruin it now?

And for the first time in a long time, I was concerned about what people thought. That is rare for me. If there is one thing I am particular about, it's intention. I always make sure anything I do reeks of intention and my best approach is to not care about what people think because it's not important. That leaves one question usually; what do I want to do? It is like stubbornness but imagine being stubborn about everything you did- eat, drink, sleep, talk, think and virtually everything. That's one key ingredient of a strong character. We need to be intentional about what we do, after all, we only get this one chance to live our dreams and we can not blow it. 

No pennies still...


                        ~A Penniless Dreamer

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